Thursday, November 18, 2010

Reason #2 - Why classic literature is my arch nemesis

Yesterday my best friend pointed out to me that Baz Luhrmann is directing a remake of The Great Gatsby staring Leonardo DiCaprio. This in turned spurred me to tell her that I loathe The Great Gatsby (although I LOVE Baz and will most likely see it based on this alone). She told me it was one of the few books she actually enjoyed in high school but has heard people echo my views. Now I can’t speak for anyone else, but my reasons for disliking this novel come down to what amounts to maybe one or two sentences. I have a serious problem with graphic images. They tend to stick in my head and haunt me at inopportune times. So suffice it to say I can remember very little about what happens in The Great Gatsby except that I absolutely can’t stand the part where the woman gets hit by the car. The all too graphic description has been disturbing me for 10+ years now. And it doesn’t stop with Gatsby. The more I thought about it the more I realized how I shun other classic novels for similar reasons. I do have certain triggers, among them is if anything bad happens to an animal. So sorry to Of Mice and Men, but I won’t be reading you again at any point in the near future. And please don’t even get me started on The Grapes of Wrath. Between the dog getting hit by the car, the dead babies and the random breast feeding…Yeah, I pretty much need a lifetime’s worth of therapy to get over what went down in that book. Thankfully ostracizing the town harlot by forcing her to embroider the first letter of the alphabet on all her clothes is totally cool with me. So I say rock on to The Scarlet Letter because I totally dug that novel. Now if someone in town had kicked a puppy while throwing rocks at Hestor, then we might have had a problem. Phew, dodged a bullet there. So to all of the great authors of past, I sincerely apologize to you for being so seemingly uncultured. I have my reasons though. And if anyone out there knows whether or not John Steinbeck has an estate somewhere please let me know. I need a place to send my therapy bills…

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